In this article:
1. “You look so big already”
You might notice a growing bump and feel tempted to comment on it, but remarks about how it looks huge, tiny, or ready to deliver any day can easily make someone feel self-conscious.Pregnancy already brings constant physical changes, and pointing them out can make them feel uneasy, even when you mean no harm. Avoiding remarks about appearance helps you be more respectful and supportive during a time when sensitivity matters most.
2. “Can I touch your belly or feel the baby kick?”
You might see this as a warm or affectionate gesture, but reaching out to touch a pregnant belly or asking to feel a kick can feel intrusive unless it is clearly invited. Pregnancy does not cancel the need for personal space, and comfort with touch varies from person to person (even among close family or friends).You might also ask about baby movements out of curiosity or excitement. However, these questions can unintentionally create worry if movements have not yet been felt. What feels like a harmless question to you can add unnecessary pressure during an already sensitive time.
3. “When I was pregnant, this is what worked for me”
You may want to share advice or personal stories about pregnancy, birth plans, or baby products, but offering them without being asked can feel overwhelming. What you see as being helpful may come across as pressure, especially when someone is already processing a lot of new information and emotions.You might also start comparing experiences by talking about how easy or difficult things were for you or someone you know. These comparisons can unintentionally suggest that there is a right or wrong way to go through pregnancy. Every journey is different, and hearing constant opinions can make someone feel like their own experience is being judged or dismissed. It is more supportive to let the pregnant person guide the conversation. If advice or insight is needed, it will be requested.
4. “Was this pregnancy planned?”
You might ask questions like this out of curiosity, but some topics are far more personal than they seem. Questions about whether a pregnancy was planned, work plans after the baby arrives, or specific feeding choices can put someone in an uncomfortable position. These subjects often involve private decisions, emotions, or circumstances that may not be open for discussion.Even when you do not intend it, direct questions can come across as intrusive or judgmental. They can make a person feel pressured to explain choices or justify deeply personal situations.
5. “Just wait, it only gets harder from here”
You may think sharing warnings or real-life stories is a way to prepare someone, but negative predictions often do more harm than good. Talking about difficult labour, endless sleepless nights, or how life will never be the same can increase anxiety during a time that already comes with many challenges.Constant reminders of what could go wrong or how hard things will be can make the journey feel heavier than it needs to be.
6. “Are you in labour already?”
As the due date gets closer, you may feel the urge to constantly check in or question every small change. While this often comes from concern, repeatedly asking if everything is fine or doubting early signs of labour can add unnecessary stress.You might also push conversations about preparations, timelines, or next steps before they are needed. Rushing into detailed planning or assuming urgency can feel pressuring, especially when the person is taking things one step at a time and staying guided by medical advice.
What Can You Say Instead to a Pregnant Person?
Choosing the right words can make conversations around pregnancy feel supportive rather than awkward. Try these:- Congratulations, that is wonderful news.
- You look really great.
- How are you feeling?
- Is there anything I can do to help, like bringing a meal or running an errand?
By choosing words that boost confidence, you help create a positive environment where the pregnant individual feels genuinely cared for. Small, thoughtful gestures and considerate conversations go a long way in making the pregnancy journey feel smoother and more joyful!
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FAQs on What Family Should NOT Say To a Pregnant Woman
- What not to say to a first-time parent?
Avoid comments that judge parenting choices, compare to others, or predict difficulties. Unsolicited advice or assumptions about capability can feel discouraging. - How can I show interest without invading a pregnant individual’s privacy?
Ask open-ended questions, like "How are things going?" or offer practical help. Let the person choose what to share without pressing for personal details.